The Boy Toy Read online

  BRENDA looks at her phone.

  BRENDA (CONT.)

  Brian got tickets to Hell’s Kitchen!

  HELEN

  He did! Tell Brian to get Jean-Phillipe’s signature for me.

  BRENDA

  'I' could do that.

  HELEN

  I know, but Brian’s gay too, so he might have a better chance..

  BRENDA

  I have to go. The line’s already forming.

  BRENDA gets up to hug HELEN, and JEANINE sits down on the chair to rest.

  HELEN

  Remember to give me that number later…or not. Okay?

  BRENDA

  Okay.

  BRENDA exits. HELEN notices JEANINE is resting.

  Beat.

  JEANINE

  I'll go make sure Keith didn't make a mess in the kitchen. (Whispered) Lord knows I'm not paid to sit around and get my feet rubbed.

  JEANINE exits.

  HELEN

  Keith!

  HELEN exits, leaving HER glass of lemonade.

  (OS) HELEN

  Keith!

  (OS) KEITH

  Yeah, babe?

  (OS) HELEN

  Let the dogs run around on their own. I have some...house chores for you to do inside.

  THEY enter.

  KEITH

  Oh really?

  HELEN

  Really. And can you get me another lemonade? The ice in this one has melted.

  KEITH

  Sure thing.

  HELEN exits. KEITH picks up HELEN and BRENDA’s lemonades. Before leaving, HE stares at the chess board and ponders about the possible moves to take. HE then realizes how much time HE’s taken and exits.

  Fade to black.

  SCENE II

  Quick lights up.

  DEVEREAU enters carrying a briefcase, taking careful notice of every item in the room.

  DEVEREAU’s only goal in life is to unravel the human mind and piece it back together as SHE sees fit…or as paying customers see fit. SHE has no moral insecurities about HER form of work and is very delighted whenever presented a challenge.

  (OS) HELEN

  Doctor?

  HELEN enters.

  HELEN

  Here you are. I'm sorry for not coming downstairs as soon as Jeanine let you in.

  DEVEREAU

  It's quite alright. I believe she's preparing some sort of appetizer for me.

  DEVEREAU opens a book.

  HELEN

  Oh. Good.

  DEVEREAU

  “Cognitive Psychology: The Chaos Theory Diagnosed”. Cute title. Am I correct in assuming that this was written by your late husband?

  HELEN takes the book and puts it on the shelf.

  HELEN

  You are.

  DEVEREAU

  Must have been a very popular psychologist to afford him a house in Beverly Hills.

  HELEN

  He was. He diagnosed Hollywood stars as a hobby, and invested in insurance companies as a career. Please sit down. I’m sure you’re still suffering from jetlag.

  DEVEREAU moves over to the chessboard.

  DEVEREAU

  Not at all. I’ve adjusted to the setbacks of flying. The ivory side clearly has the upper-hand.

  HELEN

  Ivory?

  DEVEREAU points to the chessboard.

  HELEN (CONT.)

  Okay. Do you mind if we discuss what exactly are your services, Doctor?

  DEVEREAU

  We can, but first I’d like a question of my own to be answered. How did you obtain my phone number?

  HELEN

  Through friends.

  DEVEREAU

  Ms. Crabtree, I-

  HELEN

  -Ms.Crandall-Crabtree. You may call me Helen if you like.

  DEVEREAU

  Helen, I ask, because my services are not appreciated by most of my colleagues. Many times I’ve been lured into a trap, and I’ve become cautious to a fault as a result. So, if you wouldn’t mind…

  HELEN

  I have a connection at The Canyon Rehabilitation Clinic, and my friend said you do very impressive work.

  DEVEREAU

  That I do. Who was my patient at The Canyon…oh, I remember. Yes. That one session worked too well if I’ve heard correctly. Hmm. Did I talk to your connection personally?

  HELEN

  Doctor, tell me what you can do for me.

  DEVEREAU

  Very direct. You’re a driven woman destined to succeed at any cost.

  HELEN

  Is that a compliment?

  DEVEREAU

  It means you’ll pay my fees.

  DEVEREAU opens HER briefcase, puts on some reading glasses and takes out a document. After reading to make sure it’s the right document, SHE hands it over to HELEN to read.

  HELEN

  What is this?

  DEVEREAU

  A confidentiality agreement for you and your significant other to sign.

  HELEN

  Mr. Crabtree has passed on.

  DEVEREAU

  No, I mean whom I’m going to have my session with.

  HELEN

  I’ll sign, but Keith doesn’t have to before you tell me what you do.

  DEVEREAU

  Understood. Go ahead and sign please.

  DEVEREAU hands her a pen.

  Beat.

  HELEN signs and hands one of the documents to DEVEREAU. SHE files it in HER briefcase.

  DEVEREAU

  Thank you very much, but be sure to have “Keith” sign one as well before I leave.

  HELEN

  I’m listening.

  DEVEREAU

  Helen, how much do you know of hypnosis?

  HELEN

  Well, I-

  JEANINE enters with a plate of elegant finger foods.

  JEANINE

  Here we are, doctor. I hope you enjoy them. My own recipe.

  DEVEREAU

  Thank you, but we were-

  JEANINE

  -Oh! I forgot the wine. I'll be right back.

  JEANINE puts the plate down next to DEVEREAU and then exits, but comes right back.

  JEANINE (CONT.)

  You needing anything, Ms. Crabtree?

  HELEN

  Some time with the doctor alone, thank you. And it's Ms. Crandall-Crabtree.

  JEANINE

  Right. (Whispered) I'm glad she finally getting some help from someone other than me.

  JEANINE exits. DEVEREAU examines the plate of food, trying to find the more visually compelling morsels.

  HELEN

  What do I know about hypnosis? Not much. I once saw a hypnotherapist in Las Vegas with my friend. She swore she remembers nothing even after watching the video of her pretending to be a cat. Is that what you do?

  DEVEREAU

  Cheap tricks. I can do much more than that. Picture yourself at a young age. Innocent, carefree, and thinking about the simpler things of life. Then something grave happens. Your dog is run over on the street. You lose your mother's favorite necklace that you borrowed when she wasn't looking. Your friends make fun of you for your new haircut. Suddenly, your world has been changed, and you must change with it. Exactly how you change is completely up to you. You can rise above the situation and better yourself, or you can allow yourself to be crippled by it. In either case, you are capable of becoming a completely new person, each choice being as unique as a snowflake.

  DEVEREAU (CONT.)

  It is simply personal choice that dictates whom becomes what. We have the chance to become whoever we wish to be. The problem is that we rarely chose to be the person others want us to become.

  HELEN

  So…you can change a person into whoever you want them to be?

  DEVEREAU

  For the purposes of this meeting, I can change a person into whomever you want them to be.

  JEANINE comes back with a glass of wine.

/>   JEANINE

  We're low on wine, Ms. Crabtree. Had to go to the back of the cellar to find one good enough for doctor company.

  DEVEREAU

  Although I appreciate the effort, it wasn't absolutely necessary.

  JEANINE

  Nonsense! Treating company right is the right thing to do, especially when it's a doctor. Why, my brother Curtis once had a proctologist come over for dinner, and all he offered was some stale potato chips and cheap American beer. Needless to say Curtis' next visit was...rougher than the ones before. That's why I always say, "Don't give the doctor the shaft, and he won't shaft you."

  HELEN

  Then maybe you should go get some better wine. Use my credit card. You know where to find it.

  JEANINE

  Right, right. I'll go to the market right away. It was a pleasure, Dr. Devereau.

  JEANINE hands the glass to DEVEREAU.

  DEVEREAU

  I'm finished with your personalized snack foods too. They were...delectable.

  JEANINE

  Thank you, kindly. Well, I'm off.

  JEANINE exits.

  DEVEREAU sips the wine.

  HELEN

  So, if I wanted Keith to become the world famous mathematician, you could make that happen?

  DEVEREAU laughs.

  DEVEREAU

  I cannot instill intelligence. I can make him interested in mathematics and create the desire to become the world’s greatest.

  HELEN

  Alright. For example, let’s say I want Keith to be a little more interesting to talk to. What would you do for that?

  DEVEREAU

  In what way do you mean ‘interesting’?

  HELEN

  Someone I can have a conversation with.

  DEVEREAU

  Would you like him to have similar interests to you?

  Beat.

  HELEN

  If you can’t immediately make him an expert, then no. I don’t care to talk someone who doesn’t know anything more than I do.

  DEVEREAU

  It would be unwise to have him interested in something you find boring.

  HELEN

  Right.

  DEVEREAU

  Then what do you find interesting that you don’t know anything about?

  Beat.

  HELEN

  Astrology?

  DEVEREAU

  Astrology?

  HELEN

  It’s a guilty pleasure of mine. I’m completely fascinated by the stars and solar systems, but I couldn’t stand the classes in college. It’d be nice to have a friend explain it to me.

  DEVEREAU

  Are you meaning Astronomy?

  HELEN

  Yes, Astronomy. That’s what I meant. Of course.

  DEVEREAU

  I could accomplish that.

  HELEN

  How?

  DEVEREAU

  Through deep hypnosis combined with a unique technique of subliminal suggestions. An interest in astronomy. Is there anything else you would like to change?

  HELEN

  I really haven’t given it much thought. I might have if you'd told me what you do a week ago on the phone.

  DEVEREAU

  I apologize, but my services are on the borderline of illegal.

  HELEN

  Illegal?

  DEVEREAU

  What I am capable of doing might seem like “brainwashing” to outsiders and to some politicians. Hence my high fee.

  HELEN

  How illegal?

  DEVEREAU

  Have no fears. I would be the one to suffer, not you or Keith. Besides, the only way in which I could be found out would be if either of you broke your confidentiality agreements, thus removing the both of you as valid witnesses.

  Beat.

  HELEN

  Do you promise satisfaction?

  DEVEREAU

  Of course. In the event that you find my work unsatisfactory, I will return and perform another session with Keith.

  HELEN

  Do you give refund sessions often?

  DEVEREAU

  Yes, but mostly because I find that people rarely know what they want from others. Now, do we have an agreement?

  HELEN

  I’m not-

  (OS) KEITH

  -hey, babe! Where are you? I’m sorry I’m late, but I won a medal at the swimming championship today. You should have been there. I was awesome!

  HELEN

  How much do you charge?

  DEVEREAU gets another document from his briefcase and hands it over to HELEN. SHE gets out a checkbook, writes in the information, and hands it over to DEVEREAU.

  KEITH enters.

  KEITH

  Hey, babe.

 

  KEITH and HELEN kiss.

  HELEN

  Keith, this is Dr. Devereau.

  KEITH

  Hey. I’m sorry I didn’t see you there.

  KEITH and DEVEREAU shake hands.

  DEVEREAU

  It’s a pleasure.

  KEITH

  Wait. A doctor? Helen, you okay?

  HELEN

  I’m fine, Keith. Dr. Devereau isn’t a medical doctor. She’s a hypnotherapist.

  KEITH

  Really? So what do you do, Dr. Devereau?

  DEVEREAU

  I actually am a medical doctor, but I practice mostly in psychiatrics. Specifically, hypnosis.

  KEITH

  Oh, hypnosis! Cool. Yeah, I’ve seen that on TV before. I’m not sure if I believe it or not. No offense.

  DEVEREAU

  None taken.

  KEITH

  Hey doc, you need something to drink?

  DEVEREAU

  I have an unfinished glass of wine here, but if it’s not too much trouble, some water please.

  KEITH

  Helen?

  HELEN

  I’m fine.

  KEITH

  Cool.

  KEITH takes the wine glass and exits.

  DEVEREAU

  So is he to be aware of the changes?

  HELEN

  If I can choose, then no. Is that a problem?

  DEVEREAU

  As you wish.

  KEITH enters with the water and hands it to DEVEREAU.

  KEITH

  Here’s your water.

  DEVEREAU

  Thank you.

  KEITH

  So are you friends with Helen?

  DEVEREAU

  I’m-

  HELEN

  -she is. Dr.Devereau came over, because I want to see if hypnosis is real or not.

  KEITH

  You…(to DEVEREAU) You’re not going to make her cluck like a chicken or anything, are you?

  DEVEREAU

  No.

  KEITH

  Man, that would have been funny!

  HELEN

  Keith...honey, I’m afraid to admit this, but I asked Dr. Devereau over here to hypnotize me and I’m too nervous to go through with it. Do you think…if you don’t mind…could you do it for me instead?

  KEITH

  Get hypnotized?

  HELEN

  Please?

  KEITH

  I guess so. (to DEVEREAU) What are you going to make me do?

  DEVEREAU

  Oh-

  HELEN coughs.

  DEVEREAU

  …the usual stuff. Cluck like a chicken and whatnot.

  KEITH

  I’m game, just don’t film me or anything. I’ve got a reputation to keep, and my buddies would never let me hear the end of it if they saw me on the ground barking like a dog.

  DEVEREAU

  Agreed. Now, if you would please sign this confidentiality agreement right in front of you?

  KEITH

  Why?

  HELEN

  She’s very good. So good that other hypnotists try to steal her work.

  KEITH

  Really?
>
  DEVEREAU

  I’m afraid so.

  KEITH

  Sounds fair. Where is it?

  HELEN hands the document and pen over to KEITH, and HE signs. HELEN hands it over to DEVEREAU.

  DEVEREAU

  Thank you. Now Helen, if you don’t mind leaving the room?

  KEITH

  Wait, I thought she was watching.

  DEVEREAU

  Before I can have you perform tricks, you need to be calm and rested and without any interruptions.

  HELEN

  I have some mail to organize anyway. I’ll be back in a minute.

  KEITH

  Okay, but don’t take forever. I don’t want you to miss the show!

  HELEN

  I won’t. I’ll be back in a moment doctor.

  HELEN exits.

  KEITH wanders around the room.

  KEITH

  So…what do we do?

  DEVEREAU puts the glass of water aside and gets a notepad out.

  DEVEREAU

  First tell me a little about yourself.

  KEITH

  What do you want to know?

  KEITH goes back to the chessboard and again tries to figure out the moves.