The Great Carbuncle Read online



  The Great Carbuncle

  By Justin Blasdel

  Adapted from the short story by Nathaniel Hawthorne

  Justin Blasdel

  12/12/09

  Version 4

  [email protected]

  Characters

  Matthew Robin; 20's, fervid military man

  Hannah Robin; 20's, needy little homemaker

  Bill Seeker; 50's, the self-centered hillbilly

  Dr. Antigonus Cacaphodel; Late 40's, pre-geriatric coward

  Icabod Piggnsnorto; 30's, hot-headed "family man"

  Roger Chillingworth; 50's, a dream-shattering cynic

  John Winthrop; 20's, naive poet

  Lord Edward de Vere; 30's, grounded aristocracy

  Time

  Early Fall, 1968

  Location

  Ozark Mountains, Arkansas

  Prologue

  From the peak of a mountain, a red glow slowly becomes brighter and brighter. The sun dims as if in an eclipse and thunder can be heard in the distance. As the glow increases, so do these other natural phenomena until a large, inexplicable crackle of power reverberates throughout the mountains. Then, the glow fades away and all returns to normal.

  ACT I, SCENE I

  The "Beaten Path Camping" station. It's early morning, and the yellow sun hasn't yet crawled over every mountain top. The flora is still green and lustrous, but the air has chilled and foretells another wet and freezing Winter on its way.

  MATTHEW and HANNAH ROBIN enter, holding bags over their shoulders.

  MATTHEW is an army man on leave, and anyone can see HE's not yet comfortable in civilian clothing. HE still has a good, generous smile, but it can disappear in a moment's notice.

  HANNAH is the high school sweetheart all grown up. SHE's the perfect little housewife; obedient, loving, and knows how to get what SHE wants from the well-trained significant other.

  MATTHEW and HANNAH put down their bags.

  MATTHEW

  If I've said this once about a Ford, I'll say it again: it'll get you where you need to go, but never on time. Well...here we are. Happy Honeymoon, Hannah.

  HANNAH

  Thanks, Matthew. It's just what I wanted.

  MATTHEW

  No it ain't, but thanks for lying.

  HANNAH

  It's...fine. It's perfect.

  MATTHEW

  It's cheap.

  HANNAH

  And that's just what I wanted. A good ole' fashioned camping trip with my new husband.

  MATTHEW

  A camping trip with a bunch of strangers, but...anything to make you happy.

  HANNAH

  I am happy. I have my husband, and he’s safe and alive and back home with me where he should be. And who knows? We might get lucky and find the Great Carbuncle.

  MATTHEW

  Make a good story to tell the folks back home.

  HANNAH

  Honey, if we found the Great Carbuncle, everyone would hear about us.

  MATTHEW

  Guess we could make a new wedding ring out of it. Replace the little thing I gave you.

  HANNAH

  It'd be too big for a ring. My wrist would break off.

  MATTHEW

  How do you know how big it is? You seen it before?

  HANNAH

  No...but if we're lucky, we'll be the first ones to find it.

 

  MATTHEW

  Then I guess it's a good thing I brought my good luck charm with me.

  HANNAH kisses MATTHEW.

  HANNAH

  Be weird if you didn't take me to our honeymoon.

  ROGER CHILLINGWORTH enters as HE surveys the area.

  CHILLINGWORTH is an extreme realist who thinks anything considered to be "magic" should be relabeled "illusionary". Only Darwinists survive evolution, and HE intends to spread the good word, even if no one wants to believe HIM.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Hello. Am I to assume that you are the newlyweds?

  MATTHEW

  Sure are, sir. Name's Matthew Robin.

  MATTHEW holds out HIS hand to be shook. CHILLINGWORTH assesses MATTHEW's appearance and then shakes HIS hand.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Professor Chillingworth.

  MATTHEW

  Professor? A teacher out here? That's kind of funny.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Possibly. I'm probably the only qualified educator in the county. And your wife?

  HANNAH

  Hannah Robin. Glad to meet you.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Likewise. If you don't mind me asking, aren't honeymoons usually spent secluded from the public eye?

  MATTHEW

  Yes, but--

  HANNAH

  We just bought a new house. There's still a few payments left.

  MATTHEW

  Army don't pay like it use to.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  You're a military officer? Have you ever experienced hand-to-hand combat or survived any other threats to your life?

  MATTHEW

  Sure. I was a sniper in Khe Sanh, and a damn good one too. Killed me a lot of VC 'till some shrapnel cut up my trigger finger. See?

  MATTHEW holds up HIS trigger finger and CHILLINGWORTH makes a distant inspection.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  I do. Although I'm quite sure you and your wife could have selected a more romantic location to honeymoon, I'm happy to know that a survivalist such as yourself will be joining this escapade with me.

  HANNAH

  What do you teach?

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Anthropology. The study of man.

  HANNAH

  Oh, kind of like a doctor...but not medicine.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Correct. Have either of you checked in with our tour guide yet?

  MATTHEW

  Nah. He looked kind of busy. Had three men talking in his ear all at once.

  CHLLINGWORTH looks back at the office.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  I'll acquire his attention.

  HANNAH

  Oh, there's no need.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  I insist. The sooner chores are allocated amongst the group, the sooner we can begin. Excuse me.

  MATTHEW

  Okay. If you have to.

  CHILLINGWORTH exits.

  MATTHEW

  He's kind of funny.

  HANNAH

  It must be his education. You know, it might be a good thing to have someone smart go with us, in case we get into trouble.

  MATTHEW

  Smart? If that all it takes, then you can talk us out of every danger out there, 'cause there's no one else with a smarter mouth than yours.

  HANNAH

  Matthew Eric Robin!

  MATTHEW salutes HANNAH.

  MATTHEW

  Sir, here, sir!

  HANNAH

  That's better.

  BILL SEEKER enters.

  BILL SEEKER is a ragged, weather-worn mountaineer who's survived all that nature has to throw at one man. HIS wit and determination have carried HIM this far in life, but something seems to be giving away with old age.

  SEEKER patiently waits until MATTHEW notices HIM.

  MATTHEW

  Sorry, sir. Didn't see you there.

  SEEKER

  You two the newlyweds?

  MATTHEW

  Matthew and Hannah Robin, and yes we are.

  SEEKER

  I'm Seeker. Nice to meet you. Got your money in the mail...and spent it...so you two are good to go.

  HANNAH

  We brought what you said to; clothes, blankets, and such. Oh, my camera! My camera!

  HANNAH immed
iately goes to HER bag and digs for the new 8mm camera.

  SEEKER

  Yeah, you'll get some nice pictures out there. That's what "Beaten Path Camping" is all about; pictures, swimmin', and huntin'. There ain't another place on Earth like the Ozarks. It's got to be a big change from out there in Russellville.

  MATTHEW

  Sure is, but--

  HANNAH points the camera at MATTHEW.

  HANNAH

  Hey, sweetie. Wave "hello" to the camera.

  MATTHEW waves.

  SEEKER

  That's a nice toy you got there.

  HANNAH

  Thank you. (to MATTHEW) Say something, Matthew. Like, how fun our trip's going to be.

  MATTHEW

  It won't hear me. It doesn't take sound.

  HANNAH

  Say it anyway. It'll be fun.

  MATTHEW

  I'm trying to talk, Hannah. Maybe later.

  HANNAH

  Spoilsport.

  HANNAH turns the camera off.

  MATTHEW

  (To SEEKER) I got family near here.

  SEEKER

  You do? What town?

  MATTHEW

  Yellville.

  SEEKER

  Small town. Good folk, I hear. Anyway, we got the food and tents ready, but everyone's gonna take turns carryin' it. (to HANNAH) Everyone except you, ma'am.

  HANNAH

  Thank you.

  SEEKER

  No problem. I need to go back inside and check on the--

  PIGGSNORTO (OS)

  Mr. Seeker, I got some business to speak with you.

  SEEKER

  (Whispered) Sure you do.

  PIGGSNORTO enters with a map in hand.

  PIGGSNORTO is a hefty, overbearing man with the sort of hunger in the eyes that means business. Control and Respect are HIS bread and butter, and HE'll take it wherever HE can.

  PIGGSNORTO

  Look.

  PIGGSNORTO holds up the map and points.

  SEEKER

  Where?

  PIGGSNORTO

  Here!

  SEEKER looks at the map.

  PIGGSNORTO

  (to HANNAH and MATTHEW) Hey.

  MATTHEW

  Sir.

  HANNAH

  Hi. We're the Robins. Hannah and Matthew.

  PIGGSNORTO

  Icabod Piggsnorto, owner and manager of "Piggsnorto Crystal Quartz Mines" in Hot Springs. You've heard of me.

  MATTHEW

  Nope. 'Fraid not.

  PIGGSNORTO

  Your fault. Not mine.

  SEEKER

  (to PIGGSNORTO) Yeah, I see your line. What of it?

  PIGGSNORTO

  What of it? It misses that one mine you told me we'd take a look at.

  SEEKER

  And the way you want is gonna miss Dr. Cacaphodel's spring.

  PIGGSNORTO

  He won't mind.

  SEEKER

  No? (to CACAPHODEL) Doctor. Doctor!

  CACAPHODEL enters from the office while arranging glass containers into a bag.

  CACAPHODEL is a scientist who traded HIS youth for knowledge. Although HE's no more than fifty, HE looks to have aged too fast and too harshly, as if by some sort of laboratory accident. It hasn't damaged HIS pleasant attitude, though.

  CACAPHODEL

  Yes, Mr. Seeker, I'm coming. So what's the hubbub about?

  PIGGSNORTO

  You don't mind if we skip one of your springs to check out one of my mines, do ya?

  CACAPHODEL

  I'm not sure we have to skip either. Mind if I examine the map for a moment?

  SEEKER hands the map over to CACAPHODEL.

  SEEKER

  There. You two figure it out.

  CACAPHODEL

  Don't mind if I do.

  CACAPHODEL and PIGGSNORTO debate as to the specifics of the trail as SEEKER goes back to MATTHEW and HANNAH.

  SEEKER

  There's two more of our pack.

  HANNAH

  We have a doctor going with us?

  SEEKER

  Yeah, Dr. Cacaphodel. What kind of doctor he is a mystery to me. Wants to test the springs out here for magic water.

  MATTHEW

  Like the waters out in Hot Springs.

  SEEKER

  Yeah. That's where those two met. When he finds out where you two are from, he'll ask you questions about your health, your parents' health, and your grandparents' health, but at least he's nice about it.

  MATTHEW

  And Piggsnorto?

  SEEKER

  Well...there's always one, ain't there? Now, I think you've met everyone here. Everyone except that long-hair.

  HANNAH

  Another woman?

  SEEKER

  Heh. No, ma'am, though you'll think he's one.

  MATTHEW

  Oh. A hippie.

  SEEKER

  Yeah, one of those. Would'a refused service, but...money's money. Hard times and all.

  MATTHEW

  I understand that.

  SEEKER

  I'm gonna go back inside and check on the radio for the weather, and then we'll get goin'. It's gonna be a great trip.

  HANNAH

  Well good! I haven't had one of those in years.

  MATTHEW

  Outside of the bedroom, she means.

  HANNAH

  Matthew!

  SEEKER

  I hear that.

  SEEKER exits.

  HANNAH

  Can you behave just a little? On our special trip?

  MATTHEW

  Fine. I'll be good.

  HANNAH

  Thank you.

  PIGGSNORTO

  So if we go this way, across this bridge, you get your spring and I get my mine. That fair to you?

  CACAPHODEL

  Definitely.

  PIGGSNORTO

  Good. I'll tell Seeker what way we're going.

  PIGGSNORTO leaves. CACAPHODEL observes the ROBINS.

  HANNAH

  Hello, Dr. Cacaphodel.

  CACAPHODEL

  Hello. You're the young married couple?

  MATTHEW

  Guilty as charged, sir. Matthew and Hannah Robin.

  CACAPHODEL and MATTHEW shake hands.

  CACAPHODEL

  You're a strong one, aren't you? Or it might be my withered hand.

  MATTHEW

  You're not that old. What are you, sixty?

  CACAPHODEL

  Actually, I'm not a day older than fifty.

  HANNAH

  I'm sure Matthew didn't mean to insult you.

  CACAPHODEL

  It's quite alright. Many mistake my skin condition as old age.

  MATTHEW

  What happened to you?

  HANNAH

  Matthew!

  CACAPHODEL

  It's fine. (to MATTHEW) A scientific disaster of my own making. I thought I had concocted a wrinkle-reducing cream, but instead created the opposite.

  MATTHEW

  Sorry to hear about that. I lost my job in the Army, because of my damaged trigger finger.

  MATTHEW shows HIS finger to CACAPHODEL who takes a very close look.

  CACAPHODEL

  I see. Permanent damage. Sorry for your misfortune.

  MATTHEW

  I'm fine. Got me back home just in time to marry Hannah here. So, are we the youngest two here?

  HANNAH

  He means it's neat to see...older people out here too, not just us young'uns.

  CACAPHODEL

  I believe there is one younger than you two. Mr. John Winthrop, a poet, is around here somewhere.

  MATTHEW

  The hippie?

  CACAPHODEL

  I didn't notice.

  HANNAH

  There he is.

  Enter CHILLINGWORTH and JOHN.

  JOHN is part of the new generation of peace seekers and mind
expansionists. HE sees all forms of life as gifts from the Earth, and pain is simply misunderstanding the nature of the universe.

  CHILLINGWORTH, carrying a large backpack over HIS shoulder, is still trying to write in HIS journal as JOHN spouts HIS philosophy.

  JOHN

  Hey, if you open your mind to what I'm saying, then maybe you'll see through my perception.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Exactly how developed could your uneducated perception be on the topic of survival of the fittest?

  JOHN

  That's...so wrong.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Is that really your rebuttal?

  JOHN

  No, you say "survival of the fittest", but who says what's fit to live and die?

  CHILLINGWORTH

  I believe evolution does. Dr. Cacaphodel, your opinion on the matter? You are a scientific doctor, after all.

  CACAPHODEL

  I'd...better check on Mr. Piggsnorto and Mr. Seeker.

  CACAPHODEL exits.

  JOHN

  No, man. Evolution doesn't mean kill or be killed. It means to move beyond. That's what we have to do. We have to evolve our spirits and move past the need to destroy. I wrote a haiku about it if.

  Beat.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  I still don't agree with your protest against hunting. It was in the brochure. You should have known better. (to MATTHEW) Matthew, you're second on the list to carry our food supplies. I'll be first.

  MATTHEW helps CHILLINGWORTH lay down the bag.

  MATTHEW

  No, that's alright. I'll carry it first.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Are you sure?

  MATTHEW

  Yeah. Wasn't much good to grow these muscles if I ain't going to use them.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Thank you.

  JOHN

  You're cool.

  MATTHEW

  What'd you call me?

  JOHN

  Helping others with strength instead of hurting. You're cool, man.

  MATTHEW

  Sure.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  He was a soldier who fought in the war your culture is so determined to stop.

  JOHN

  Really?

  MATTHEW

  Uh-huh.

  JOHN backs away from MATTHEW.

  JOHN

  You...no judgment from me. Everyone's got a chance to move beyond their past. No reason to bring the war with you.

  MATTHEW

  I'm not going to hurt you.

  JOHN

  No?

  MATTHEW

  Nah. I got some service buddies who turned hippy too. It doesn't bother me anymore.

  JOHN

  Cool. Cool.

  MATTHEW

  Yeah, me and them were all in the Fourth Division, or the "Ivy League" as we called it.

  JOHN

  Plants. Awesome.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  It's a pun on the Roman numeral four. "I...V". Even the militia is beyond your intellect.

  JOHN

  Or I'm too wise for them.

  HANNAH

  (to JOHN) Hi. I'm Hannah. We're the Robins.

  JOHN

  My parents call me John.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  As opposed to what you call yourself?

  JOHN

  There you go again. You don't get it.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  And hopefully I never will.

  SEEKER (OS)

  Okay! We'll go your way! Last time I'm doing this anyway.

  PIGGSNORTO (OS)

  What?

  SEEKER (OS)

  Get your stuff and move it on over to the circle!

  MATTHEW

  Are we suppose'd to be in a circle?

  HANNAH

  He probably means to get ready to go, honey. Grab our stuff.

  MATTHEW picks up the bag of food and HIS clothes bag. HANNAH, CHILLINGWORTH, and JOHN, holding onto THEIR bags, form a shoulder-to-shoulder line starting with MATTHEW.

  PIGGSNORTO and CACAPHODEL, already carrying THEIR bags, enter with the map in hand and double-checking the new path. SEEKER enters, almost ready to chew off HIS arm from having to talk at length to PIGGSNORTO.

  HANNAH turns the camera on and points it at SEEKER.

  HANNAH

  Oh, Mr. Seeker, could you wave to--

  SEEKER

  First, let's get this straight. I'm not Mister Seeker. I'm just plain ole' Seeker. Y'all start callin' me that from now on. Second, put your bags down. I've got some news to share.

  HANNAH

  What kind of news?

  PIGGSNORTO

  For the price of this walk in the woods, it better not be bad news.

  SEEKER

  It'll be whatever it--

  SFX: A truck coming to a halt.

  DE VERE (OS)

  I thank you, madam! You're a saint amongst barbarians, I assure you!

  Enter DE VERE, carrying a small bag over the shoulder.

  DE VERE is a blue-blood Englishman who takes far too much pride in HIMSELF and HIS crumbling family estate. No matter how low HE must stoop, DE VERE will always be

  next to royalty in HIS mind.

  DE VERE

  To believe there's no taxi service in this wilderness. Why, even the Isalo Park has it's mules. Madagascar? Africa? Well, not really Africa, but you get the general idea.

  SEEKER

  I'm guessin' you're Vere, ain't you?

  DE VERE

  Lord Edward de Vere, at your service. Well, let's be honest. You're at my service, aren't you? Hello, everyone.

  ALL greet DE VERE.

  SEEKER

  Yeah, let me introduce you to everyone. Mr. Piggsnorto, Dr.Cacaphodel, John, Professor Chillingworth, and Matthew and Hannah Robin.

  HANNAH

  Hi!

  HANNAH waves at DE VERE.

  DE VERE

  How lovely! I'm being filmed already.

  DE VERE gives HANNAH a gracious bow.

  DE VERE

  Pleased to meet you too. So which one of you will be carrying my luggage for me?

  PIGGSNORTO

  Hah!

  SEEKER

  Everyone's carrying their own load and then-some.

  DE VERE

  Really? Couldn't I pay you a few American dollars and have you carry it for me?

  SEEKER

  Hell no!

  DE VERE

  You don't have to be so bloody rude about it.

  SEEKER

  Movin' on...first, welcome to the "Beaten Path Camping" tour, where you and nature can't get no closer anywhere else in the whole world. You folks are in for three whole days of hikin', fishin', and if you're a good shot, huntin' too.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Well fortunately, I'm an excellent marksman.

  SEEKER

  Good! Maybe you'll shoot a big ole' buck for us to eat.

  DE VERE

  Ooh, local delicacies.

  JOHN

  That's so wrong.

  SEEKER

  I've been givin' this tour for thirty years...thirty long years...and it keeps gettin' better and better every time. And I happen to believe that this new path I wrote up special for you all--

  PIGGSNORTO

  He had some help.

  Beat.

  SEEKER

  This new path, not the best path, happens to go over an old bridge, but this new path, I feel...I know, is our way to the legendary, magnificent, biggest gem known to the Ozarks, the Great Carbuncle!

  ALL cheer, except for CHILLINGWORTH.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  We won't find it.

  HANNAH

  Why's that, Professor?

  CHILLINGWORTH

  It doesn't exist. The myth of the Great Carbuncle is an old wives' tale meant to give hope to a rather hopeless area. This whole trip is a sham!

  DE VERE

&n
bsp; It is?

  PIGGSNORTO

  You didn't figure that out already?

  SEEKER

  Hey! (To CHILLINGWORTH) If that's what you believe, then why you here?

  CHILLINGWORTH

  As part of my anthropological research. It is my duty to disprove this ridiculous myth once and for all, and when I've done so, this experience will be the final chapter in my book Mythstaken: Realizing the Difference Between Imaginings and Reality.

  Beat.

  SEEKER

  Whatever gets you through the day. (to ALL) So the rest of you ready to go find that Great Carbuncle!

  ALL (except CHILLINGWORTH)

  Yeah!

  SEEKER

  That's good to know, 'cause my bit of bad news is the weatherman says there's a storm comin' through here. One of the earliest and biggest winter storms they've ever seen.

  HANNAH

  Will it ruin the trip?

  SEEKER

  Can't say.

  CACAPHODEL

  Exactly what dangers are we facing...Seeker?

  SEEKER

  Freezin' rains, freezin' winds, freezin' temperatures...pretty much everythin' freezin'.

  DE VERE

  That settles it. We'll have to postpone the hike until the weather has cleared.

  EVERYONE voices mixed opinions. HANNAH turns the camera off.

  SEEKER

  Afraid you can't do that.

  DE VERE

  And why not?

  SEEKER

  I've got to close shop. Goin' out of business. Seems like no one's got the money for an adventure these days. After this trip, I'm goin' to work in my cousin's lumber yard.

  HANNAH

  What?!?

  JOHN

  This is bumming me out.

  CACAPHODEL

  Then shall we expect full refunds?

  SEEKER

  Sorry, no refunds.

  ALL are very upset by this.

  SEEKER

  Look, I don't have your money anymore. I'm broke as hell and about to lose my livelihood. However, I was never the kind of man to steal from another, and I'm willin' to give you folks my last tour... that is if none of you are afraid of gettin' a little wet

  Beat.

  SEEKER

  What do you say?

  HANNAH

  Matthew, let's go with him.

  MATTHEW

  What? He says the weather's going to freeze us like popsicles.

  HANNAH

  We can't afford another trip. We spent all our free money to find the Great Carbuncle and camp.

  JOHN

  Me too, brothers. I'm totally broke.

  PIGGSNORTO

  There's nothing nature has that can stop me from getting what I want. I paid for a trip, and I'm getting one.

  DE VERE

  I'm not poor. I'm not, but I don't see a problem with continuing, so long as we have our guide to protect us.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  ...and a medical doctor.

  CACAPHODEL

  I suppose I should go. If any of you were harmed and I could have aided you, I'd never forgive myself.

  SEEKER

  So...we all agree on this?

  MATTHEW

  Yeah, let's go.

  SEEKER

  Good! Good. Everyone go to the office so you can get your tents and sleepin' bags.

  SEEKER exits. ALL pick up THEIR bags.

  DE VERE

  Will we have to carry those, too?

  SEEKER (OS)

  Yeah!

  DE VERE

  (muttered) Bloody hell.

  DE VERE, CACAPHODEL, and PIGGSNORTO exit.

  JOHN

  You see? When people work together, anything is possible.

  CHILLINGWORTH

  Never underestimate the power of idiocy in numbers, or greed for that matter.

  JOHN and CHILLINGWORTH exit.

  HANNAH

  Matthew.

  MATTHEW

  Huh?

  HANNAH

  Thank you for the honeymoon.

  MATTHEW

  Wish it could've been in a fancy hotel in a warm bed.

  HANNAH

  I don't need those things. Not really. All I need is you.

  MATTHEW

  You telling the truth?

  HANNAH

  You know I am. Thank you for this.

  MATTHEW

  It was nothing, but if that storm blows in, we better find that Great Carbuncle, or I'll be mad as hell.

  HANNAH

  Matthew!

  HANNAH and MATTHEW exit.

  MATTHEW (OS)

  I'm just kidding.

  END ACT I, SCENE I

  ACT I, SCENE II

  A clearing in the forest. It's nearing dusk; the point where the sky is still lit but barely changing colors. The weather is starting to get worse as the clouds collect and the temperature drops.

  JOHN and SEEKER are sitting on the ground looking up at the sky and laughing at apparently nothing. There is a Coleman Sportser Stove (propane cooker) that's turned on and is set upon the ground nearby.

  JOHN

  Yeah, like...all those stars, they got worlds spinning around them...and they can see our sun like we can see their suns...but our sun looks like a star to them, like...their sun looks like a star to us. You see?

  SEEKER

  Never quite thought of it like that. So those other worlds have things looking back at us too, so we're never really alone at night, long as we can see the stars.

  JOHN

  Yeah, if they're not getting rain or anything. Man, what kind of clouds do you think they have?

  SEEKER

  Probably same as us, but not as pretty.

  JOHN

  You think so?

  SEEKER

  Mm-hmm.

  MATTHEW and HANNAH enter.

  HANNAH

  It's getting chilly.

  MATTHEW

  Don't worry about it. I'll warm you up soon.

  MATTHEW playfully nudges HANNAH.

  HANNAH

  Matthew! Can it. Public places.

  MATTHEW

  Yeah, yeah. Seeker, we got our tent up and everything. We're ready to...what's that smell?

  JOHN and SEEEKER laugh.

  HANNAH

  Smells like herbs. Are you cooking something?

  SEEKER

  Not yet. Got to let that thing warm up first. I prefer the old fashioned camp fire, but that Eng-lander insisted on using his new fancy toy.

  JOHN

  Eng-lander.

  JOHN and SEEKER laugh.

  MATTHEW

  You two been smoking wacky-tobaccey?

  HANNAH

  Wacky-what?

  JOHN and SEEKER laugh.

  HANNAH

  You two should be ashamed. You know it's...(whispered) illegal.

  SEEKER

  Then turn me in. My cousin's the sheriff.

  JOHN

  He is?

  SEEKER

  Nothing to worry about it.

  HANNAH

  Matthew.

  MATTHEW

  We'll be okay, (to JOHN and SEEKER) so long as they don't smoke any more. You understand me?

  JOHN

  I'm good.

  SEEKER

  I hear ya.

  MATTHEW

  Good. Now Seeker, I believe you have some dinner for us.

  SEEKER

  I do! I got hotdogs.

  JOHN

  None for me. I'll eat the buns, but no butchered animals on my conscience.

  MATTHEW

  No meat? You're kind'a odd, aren't you?

  SEEKER

  I'll go get 'em. Here, help me up.

  SEEKER holds out HIS hand and MATTHEW pulls SEEKER up. SEEKER loses his balance from the quick change from sitting to standing.

  MATTHEW

  You okay?

  SEEKER

  Yeah, I'
m good. Goin' to get me a hotdog!

  SEEKER exits.

  HANNAH

  Is it okay to leave him alone?

  MATTHEW

  I'm more worried about leaving him alone with the food.

  JOHN

  Hey, Hannah.

  HANNAH

  Yes?

  JOHN

  Why aren't you filming? The setting sun's painting you an awesome view.

  HANNAH

  It's the cold. I don't want to break my new camera. It cost a lot, you know.

  MATTHEW

  And she didn't bring as much film as she thought.

  HANNAH

  Hey.

  MATTHEW

  I told you.

  HANNAH

  I know, but it's not your job to rub it in.

  MATTHEW

  Here, I can make it up to you.

  MATTHEW takes off HIS jacket and lets HANNAH sit down on it before HE sits down too.

  HANNAH

  Thanks, honey.

  MATTHEW

  Anything for my woman.

  MATTHEW and HANNAH kiss.

  DE VERE (OS)

  I thank you again, doctor. Without your brilliance, we might of never had our tent up in time for dinner.

  CHILLINGWORTH and DE VERE enter.